Repetition--far too often avoided--can be a powerful rhetorical device. It can bring order and balance to a sentence'€™s parts. And it can rivet a word to the reader'€™s frontal lobe with more impact than elegant variation ever could. This week'€™s Tip is on repeating a word.

Repeating a word increases its power in the sentence by forcing the reader to reconsider its meaning and that of the words it frames or modifies. Consider this example, from Henry Luce's The American Century:

In this whole matter of War and Peace especially, we have been at various times and in various ways false to ourselves, false to each other, false to the facts of history, and false to the future.

The string of falses hammers the point and instills rhythm.

This edit counteracts the tendency of some writers to prefer synonyms over repetition. Perhaps intended to show a commend of language, this approach can confuse:

A delightful fairy tale has taken hold lately in some economic policy circles: the economy is poised for a glorious burst of sustained, 1960s-style growth without inflation. It's a story told by a spectrum of influential figures, from conservatives to liberal luminaries. Like most good fables, this one features a horrible monster who is blocking the path to eternal happiness. That would be the chairman of the Fed, who cannot see that the economic terrain has shifted.

The three terms--€”tale, story, fable--€”force the reader to figure out whether the three are different or the same. The example is doctored slightly from the original. Sticking with fairy tale, tale, and tales, as Paul Krugman did in The New York Times Magazine, makes the passage more coherent--€”with the repeated terms binding the sentences:

A delightful fairy tale has taken hold lately in some economic policy circles: the economy is poised for a glorious burst of sustained, 1960s-style growth without inflation. It'€™s a tale told by a spectrum of influential figures, from conservatives to liberal luminaries. Like most good tales, this one features a horrible monster who is blocking the path to eternal happiness. That would be the chairman of the Fed, who cannot see that the economic terrain has shifted.

Last week I wrote about sentinel nouns, which push a working noun into a prepositional phrase. Many of those sentinel nouns also turn up as weak nouns, following a noun adjective that should displace them.

Consider this, from yesterday'€™s Wall Street Journal:

Corporations have pared back their debt burden, but consumers owe more than ever.

Why not delete burden? Perhaps because it's not the absolute amount of debt but the ratio of debt to cash flow. But even if that'€™s the case, readers would not be led astray by simply writing debt.

I confess that I spent a couple of hours hunting for weak nouns in this week's The Economist and found none. But they do turn up frequently in the writing of our clients at large organizations.

Poverty levels increased                                  Poverty increased

Price levels rose                                             Prices rose

For corporate responsibility purposes               For corporate responsibility

Part of a bank workout strategy                        Part of a bank workout

Light manufacturing activities                           Light manufacturing

Singapore'€™s growth performance                     Singapore's growth

In the telecommunications sector                      In telecommunications

Policies to curb inflationary pressures               Policies to curb inflation

Foreign exchange carry-trade markets              Foreign exchange carry trade

Easier money supplies                                    Easier money

More flexible exchange rate regimes                More flexible exchange rates

As with others of these edits, we'€™re compiling a list of weak nouns, identifying when to cut them and when to leave them. Please send us any you might find.

One of the main tasks in editing your writing is ridding sentences of unnecessary words. So, as I read the Lexington column in this week'€™s Economist, the following sentence caught my eye.

He [Obama] wants to use the combination of his soaring rhetoric and his broad appeal to change the weather of American politics--€”hence his admiration for Mr Reagan'€™s power to transform politics, if not for what he did with that power.

Combination is what I call a sentinel noun, announcing the impending arrival of a stronger noun (or two), relegated to a prepositional phrase. The standard edit here is to cut the combination of, propelling the reader to soaring rhetoric and broad appeal.

He [Obama] wants to use his soaring rhetoric and his broad appeal to change the weather of American politics--hence his admiration for Mr Reagan's power to transform politics, if not for what he did with that power.

The sentinel noun doesn'€™t turn up too often in the well written and edited Economist, but elsewhere in this week'€™s are:

For many, the act of voting will be even more solitary.

Voting's an act, so the act of is dispensable but defensible. And:

The process of choosing the next leader of the world's most powerful country, in other words, is still at an early stage. But it has already delivered big surprises.

Choosing'€™s a process, so the process of is again dispensable but defensible. If the phrase is dispensed with, the two sentences could read:

Choosing the next leader of the world's most powerful country, in other words, is still at an early stage. But the process has already delivered big surprises.

In the piece on financial regulation, also in this week's Economist, the noun is the point, not a sentinel:

the patchwork of national rules and regulators that govern them.

to redesign the architecture of global finance.

The chances of an effective global regulatory regime are

the result of inadequate national supervision

the lack of teamwork between

The origins of today's problems lie not

But take another look at the last example. There's a case for cutting The origins of and changing the rest to Today'€™s problems arise not from or something similar. If I were short on space, I'd likely make that edit.

So these are some good uses, when the construction the + noun + of adds meaning. But it becomes useless when the noun isn't working but is only announcing. As in, the problem of poverty, as if poverty isn't a problem. And as in, the issue of early primaries, as if early primaries aren'€™t an issue.

The point is that a the + noun + of construction should become a cue for taking a closer look. Here is a starting list of sentinels to watch for and cut, along with the articles and prepositions that prop them up:

the act of                              the experience of                 the presence of

the adoption of                     the extent of                         the problem of

the amount of                       the field of                            the process of

the area of                            the form of                           the prospect of

the case of                          the functioning of                  the purpose of

the challenge of                   the idea of                            the question of

the character of                    the importance of                  the range of

the combination of                the introduction of                  the rate of

the concept of                      the issue of                          the set of

the course of                        the level of                           the strategy of

the degree of                        the magnitude of                  the sum of

the development of                the nature of                          the use of

the element of                      the number of                       the way of

the establishment of             the pattern of

the existence of

(Our ClearEdits software flags all these sentinel nouns.)